Praise for the Sunflower

Sunflower

Oh, how beautiful you are!
Look at you;
see how grand you’ve become!
From your darkness came this light;
from your dark seeds of pain,
piercing, heart-wrenching pain,
came these beautiful, bright petals,
such awe-striking sight!
I want to lose myself in you;

you are the clearest, sweetest dream.
I want to find myself in you,
your royal highness,
Queen of Wands.

I adore you!

Love ‘IsReal’- ‘MicHeal’ Jackson

paint

Painted by freckledmestiza

When I was in SS3 [last year of high school], my Literature-in-English teacher—Papa Ade—did something that I never forgot. Pa Ade was my father, so to speak, because I was living away from home at the time; I lived in the school’s girls’ hostel/dormitory. I called him ‘Baba’, and I spent a lot of time with him in his office and in the library. He was (and of course, still is) a senior [he taught one of my classmate’s mother], and that was enough reason for me to love him. Natally, I have Saturn in the 1st house, and as a child, I remember feeling very out of place, like the ugly duckling, among other children, but happy among the adults. I liked to listen to them, and terribly hated it when I was told to cover my ears or close my eyes or go play with my mates.

I loved Pa Ade, and I got very close to him. I was also very curious about him, about what had happened between him and his wife, and he told me all I needed to know. I couldn’t say the same about many of my classmates though. They found his style of teaching rather archaic, and the fact that we had to have a dictionary each time we had lessons with him really pissed a few off. He was very particular about it- expect to be flogged or embarrassed if you don’t have your dictionary. I genuinely liked to read to the class whenever I had a chance, and we would take turns reading parts of the books/novels, sometimes. I enjoyed Baba’s class very much.

I am an introvert, but I tried to portray myself as an extrovert in Senior Secondary School. I had been bullied/made fun of, a good number of times, in Junior Secondary School [which was a different school entirely] due to a supposed ‘lack of exposure’, and I wasn’t going to have it in Senior Secondary School. My mantra was a bit like “I don’t want nobody fucking with me in these streets.” Whether it brought me more hate or not, I don’t know, but I made it clear- I wasn’t going to be pushed around. Now that I’m older and I see that I have Lilith in the 5th house natally, ‘boom’, my feeling out of place among my mates as a child seems to make a lot of sense.

Where am I going with these memories? I don’t know. I’ll write more about my experiences in the future. None of these things that I keep remembering and mentioning has anything to do with this article; on second thought, maybe they all do.

Back to the occurrence that happened that I will never forget: Pa Adeniyi came to class one day and walked straight to Israel, my classmate. As it turned out, Israel had spelled his name as ‘Isreal’, and that had really pissed Baba off. He must have hit him with his rubber ‘cane’ [he hit me once with it in class before we got close, and it really hurt] if I remember clearly. Israel was livid. I guess it traumatized me since I began to pay more attention to my work, ensuring that I never made that mistake (or a similar one) from then on.

Lately, I have been typing or writing ‘Michael’ as ‘Micheal’ subconsciously, and then correcting it as quickly as I realize my mistake, sometimes embarrassingly, and I have found it very interesting. I had been ignoring it until I literally asked myself the ‘what for?’ question today. ‘I know how to spell ‘Michael’, and ‘Israel’; why is my brain ‘moving mad’ and acting this way?’ Then I looked closely and immediately realized what the message was- MicHEAL. I have been noticing 11:11s and 1:11s far more frequently than other number synchronicities lately, and I believe that this too, MicHEAL, is a message.

Michael Jackson is still very much a healer, even as a spirit, not only due to the messages/energies that he put out to the world via the music that he made when he was with us in the flesh, but because he is doing lightwork and awakening/communicating with lightworkers/healers, with the help of the angels and his spiritual squad, even though he doesn’t live like us anymore. Michael is not disturbed as a spirit due to all the lies that are being told against him. It is all for a purpose, and people are being awakened to the kind of soul that Michael really was and still is, much more than they were.

Being kind to one another, taking care of and loving children, being childlike but not childish- these and more were Michael’s messages. I don’t want to read too much into how I feel because it is not necessary. Whether this is a call for me to be encouraged in my healing work or address my suppressed emotions, I cannot profoundly claim to know. I know that it could be both.

Coincidentally, it is Children’s Day in Nigeria- May 27, and I have been trying to think of what to put out on my Instagram page to that effect. I thought about posting a video of Michael delivering a speech while he was receiving the NAACP Awards in 1993. I have attached the video to this post but this is my favourite part of what he said:

“In every person,
there is a secret song in their heart.
It says ‘I am free.
It sings ‘I am one’.
This is the natural feeling of every child-
to be free as the wind,
to be one with every other child.
All the trouble in the world is caused by forgetting this feeling,
and when I perform,
my connection is with the people,
just to remind me of that-
to be free and to be one.

Michael is telling us (like he has always done) that we should open ourselves up for healing, and by doing so, we will heal one another and heal our earth. The big question is ‘how’, and the answer appears to be simple, in theory, at least. We must be child-like; again, not childish, child-like. We must be forgiving (of others, and most-especially, ourselves), loving, kind, compassionate, and free.

We must return to what we once were before ‘life’ began, what we were sent to this consciousness to be. We must learn lessons without learning pain and bitterness, and if we have learnt bitterness, we must unlearn it. 

Love is real. 

The Love Rove

Spirit Painting- Elaine Clayton

Spirit Painting – Elaine Clayton

Love is death.
To fall in love truly is to die,
to bury you in yourself,
your arms,
your doubts,
your fears,
past hurts that brought tears.

To fall in love truly is to become a spirit,
to levitate,
to float and glide through the day,
and even with your eyes wide open,
to dream.
It’s an experience that gives your body
control of itself;
it smiles when you don’t ask it to,
and flies when you don’t know how to.

Love is birth.
To fall in love truly is to be reincarnated
while you keep the same skin.
It is to be reborn,
to become a foetus before you sleep,
hugging and kissing the air
when they are not near,
speaking to them
even when they can’t hear.
It is to become someone else,
someone new,
seeing things that are not there,
feeling things that make you bare.

To fall in love truly is to want to grow,
to want to know,
trusting and wondering like a child.
It is to be happy,
to be unafraid,
to be very aware and ill,
to be at peace.

For Michael.

Today is Another Day

Grillo

Painted by Yusuf Grillo

Today is another day;
today is an other day.
Tomorrow will become yesterday,
a brand new yesterday,
if you don’t take new steps today.

Take four steps to grow,
take three steps to heal,
take two steps to love,
take a step to part ways
with today’s yesterday.

Fruitless

Unlike almost everyone else,
I was never one to count
the seeds in my apple.
“If this seed doesn’t grow,
that one will grow”
was never really for me.
The first one I saw
was the one I chose;
I chose to count the apples in that seed,
to do whatever it would take to make it grow.

No, it didn’t grow,
because it couldn’t grow,
because it wasn’t even a seed;
I won’t pretend that I didn’t know.

Let’s Be Friends

Max Ginsburg: The Friends

Max Ginsburg: The Friends

I sincerely, deeply care about you;
I want to always be here, and there, for you.
In this world, where good friends are few,
I want to make this new experience true.
I want you to know, that I really do love you.

“Tick”

“Tick” goes the clock,
“tick, tick”.
What you have to do,
do quick.

“Tick” goes the clock,
“tick, tick”.
What you have to stop,
stop quick.