Mistakes are for Retakes

First, you make mistakes,
then you let them make you.
You are not your mistakes;
pay no mind, if you begin to hear “boo”.
“Experience is the best teacher”;
that, in fact, is quite true.
Fall, then raise yourself back up,
there is nothing you can’t do.

I’M MISS TAKE, THE OLDEST TEACHER;
I TEACH HIM, AND I TEACH HER.
YOU BECOME YOUR BEST AS A CREATURE,
AND AS A CREATOR,
WHEN YOU REALIZE THAT YOUR
SCAR IS YOUR MOST-ATTRACTIVE FEATURE.

Can You?

If you think you can,
you can.
If you think you can’t,
you’re right.

The Society’s Guide to Being a Man, 101.

The only way to be a man
is to not be human.
Don’t cry;
be sad, but don’t say why.
Don’t feel;
hurting someone is the best way to heal.
Don’t express yourself when you do feel,
and if you must,
do it with clenched fists.

The only way to be seen as strong
is to insist that you’re never wrong,
and if a woman isn’t under
your absolute control,
you can’t be a man on your own-
you can’t possibly be whole.

Heal: You Are Beautiful

Were there terrible men and women in your lives,
relatives or non-relatives, at any point,
who found it pleasing to compare your beauty to someone else’s, 
in order to get to you and make you think less of yourself
or get you to agree to whatever perversion they wanted to try with you.

“You are fine but not as fine as your mother; why are you feeling yourself?
Remove your skirt, let me see your legs” and such.

I bring you healing. You are beautiful, and I’m not just trying to patronize you. Don’t ever let anyone determine what you think of yourself. 

Love Yourself

Feeling unloved is one thing,
feeling unlovable is another.
The latter is the very first
step to self-destruction.

When you begin to feel unlovable,
you stop loving yourself.

You can survive if other
people don’t love you,
but you can’t, if you don’t love yourself.

The Portal

BeFunky CollageIf he tells you your body is ruined
’cause it has been touched by another man,
ask him why he thinks so poorly of the male body,
and his own self,

as destructive and ruinous.

Change is Stable

If you aren’t flexible,
you won’t grow.
If you don’t grow,
you won’t survive this earth.

You can’t breathe in forever;
you’d wound yourself.
Breathe in for as long as you want to,
but get ready to release your breath.

Does the Devil Have a Devil?

I wonder if the devil has a devil.
I wonder if the devil’s devil has made him a devil
so he can make us little devils.


We know that sin got into the earth through the devil, at least that is what we are taught in our Sunday Schools and children’s churches, but I’ve always wondered how sin got into Heaven. Pride, arrogance and covetousness were the first few wrongs that Lucifer committed, and there was no mention of another Lucifer who tempted them. Those who have seen the devil [how? where? lol] claim that he, or she, or neither, looks androgynous; that is a discussion for another day, or maybe not. I don’t want to disqualify anyone’s visions; life is so complex and there is no all-in-all framework for what is or is not possible, and what can or cannot be seen.

Maybe all beings are inherently imperfect or sinful. The devil may be present to aid and abet [how?] but if you don’t want to jump down from the top of the building, he won’t push you. Claiming that the devil made you do this or that is a form of psychopathy. That’s why religion makes pretenders out of people; I may be wrong. We bind and cast the devil for encouraging us to eat the fruit, but we don’t bind and cast ourselves, because we can’t. We ask for forgiveness when we think we’ve broken one of God’s laws without really understanding how what we’ve done is wrong. If we thought it was wrong, we wouldn’t have done it in the first place, but our very selves didn’t see anything wrong with it. We enjoyed it. Think about it; it’s a ‘good versus evil’ morality thing.

God put the forbidden fruit there. I have always wondered why- if you don’t want them to touch it, don’t put it there- but we as human beings aren’t supposed to think about things like that to “avoid God’s wrath”. I have listened to several teachings that prove, to a reasonable extent, that the Bible is basically a code, and none of the words are to be taken literally. If you don’t understand the original language that the Bible was written in, and the contexts in which the words were used by the authors, you would never be able to comprehend what has been stated beyond what you can read. The tree of the knowledge of good and evil was not necessarily a physical tree in the middle of a physical garden. I am not going to make any reference to the occult, so, for the purpose of this writing, let’s assume that it was. 

Eve probably ate it so she could blame the devil, and she gave it to her man, not just because it tasted good but she knew it wouldn’t just be her that’d be affected by the consequences. She probably didn’t think about eating it only when the devil told her to; she was only waiting for the right time. Who says Adam wasn’t eyeing the tree too? Now that he had two entities to share the consequences with, he ate the fruit without much ado. That’s about as human and sinful as it can get.  The devil didn’t need to whisper in Adam’s ears before he ate it, before he sinned.

Do I know where I’m going with all these? No. What I’m saying is that it’s pretty natural for us to commit wrongs; the devil only points our attention to the ‘sin’ if we haven’t already noticed it. The sin is committed by us. We shouldn’t separate our selves from ourselves and begin to hold divine expectations for ourselves. It is pretty natural to have human desires because that is what we still are, although it becomes far more restrained when we seek to only pursue the things that (the Christian) God finds honourable. We don’t suddenly become spirits when we pledge our allegiance to God. 

I guess that’s why David quickly became a man after God’s heart, and he wasn’t even a High Priest. He cut the “Satan made me do it” bullshit. He knew he wanted Bathsheba.

Religion shouldn’t make us distance ourselves from our selves, so much so that we begin to judge others for being human, promising them eternity in hell. I get very quickly irritated when Christians do that.

The devil did not make you do it; at most he encouraged you [“encouraged you”, lol, this is also bullshit] but you did it. Whether or not you are sorry for doing it, or you feel you need to be sorry, is up to you and God. Stating that any natural, human feeling you have after surrendering to God (that could lead to sin) is of the devil is a lie. 

You are the devil. You think there’s a devil somewhere who has nothing better to do all day than to whisper in your ear to steal an extra piece of meat, cheat in a test or lie to your father? Really? Stop it.

Birdterfly

A butterfly should never call itself a bird because, even it can fly with the birds, people would be very quick to remind it that it doesn’t belong with them.

On the other hand, if a bird calls itself a butterfly, people will remind it of how far it has travelled, of how strong its wings are and how much it has achieved- how very “birdy” it is.

The former is done more often than the latter, but whenever people choose to do the latter, they go wild with it.

Don’t Live in Denial

When someone shows you
who they really are,
you must believe them.
Don’t live in denial.
Make no excuses for them.
Go over what you learnt
from your experience with them,
forgive yourself for everything
you think you did wrong,
and move on.

Exist in the present,
bury the dead feelings that have
made your heart their home,
and leave it all behind.
Live.


UNREQUITED LOVE:

There are two kinds of abuse in love. The first kind is the one you suffer from before the other person shows you who they really are and what they really want. The abuser would be them if it’s the first kind, because they can’t really decide if they want you or not, at your own expense. They’re not sure if they love you, so they want you to wait till they make up their mind.

The other kind is self-inflicted. Someone bluntly says they don’t love you or they don’t want to have anything to do with you and you say “oh, I mustn’t pay any attention to that. He’s a Pisces. He’s just being his moody self; there’s nothing wrong here,” or someone refuses to return your calls and messages and you say “you know how these INFP Capricorns and Scorpios are, plus his grandma’s sister’s daughter’s baby daddy’s second cousin’s niece died, so he’s probably just in a bad mood or busy with work”. No, what are you doing?

The other person/party wouldn’t be at fault in cases like the second one. It’s up to you to jolt out of this terrible, energy-sucking fantasy that you have placed yourself in.

Ask yourself, “what good is this unbalanced, abusive union or lack thereof to me?” If your answer is “none”, you can make a change right there and then. You can cry if you need to. You have to make yourself happy again, without them. 

You wouldn’t need to worry about, or be unsure if someone loves you if they do, because it will be clear; it will be as clear as a bright, sunny day.

The key to the prison in your heart is in a safe place in your mind. In cases of unrequited love, one must accept the challenge of thinking more and feeling less. Feeling and daydreaming, till it begins to affect your health, will affect you very badly. It will make you useless to yourself. It’s hard, but one must die first to possess eternal life. Stop living in denial. Let go! 🌻 “Alaafia.” 💛🍯